Tag Archives: forgiveness

Telling Lies in the Hope that They’ll Soon Be True…

Lies. After hearing this word, or being a victim of them, or having them come out of your own mouth, how do you feel? What feelings are associated with not telling the exact truth? Chances are, just naturally, they tend to lean towards the negative end of the spectrum. Even without knowing the complete story, we usually do not take kindly to lies and have an unflattering impression of the person doing the lying. These reactions don’t allow us to consider potential underlying reasons that the person has for stretching the truth. This information could prove valuable to better understand the other person and may even be turned into positive use.

That’s why I found refreshing the Globe and Mail article that offered another perspective and interpretation on reasons why people may lie or exaggerate. I particularly found enlightening one suggestion about how “lies” could actually reflect what the person is trying to achieve, or a goal to be obtained.

The article helped remind me not to jump on somebody, and too quickly form a negative impression of someone, when they lie. It gave me insight on how lying can be seen as part of the process towards something and that we should think of ways on how it can motivate.

With this in mind, would you be willing to forgive and understand some of the lies and exaggerations I’ve provided on various sections of this blog? Heheheh…..

-Patrick Law

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Filed under Working

Cheating On Each Other (With Each Other)

Do you remember the story of a couple who broke up from maybe half a year ago or even longer? (maybe from Bosnia, but I can’t quite remember) Okay, maybe it’s ridiculous of me to ask such a question to strain our memories on something that was far, far away from major news. I couldn’t find reference of the story when doing a database search of newspapers so, after reading this post, if anyone can point me toward a source, I would greatly appreciate it.

What’s the story? I heard it very briefly on the radio while driving home from work. I wanted to say something, I wanted to react, but at that time I did not have a blog, so my hands were tied. I yelled, but nothing happened.

So, my apologies for bringing back old news. For some reason something seemingly so trivial has stuck with me all this time. The story involves a couple – man and wife. Their relationship apparently was not going well, so they started listening to their inner temptations and considering other options. That means being open to meeting other people in secret.

The husband started an affair with a woman over the internet. The wife started an affair with a man over the internet. They both started to learn and get to know their new partners. As the respective online chatting increasingly became more intimate, face-to-face meetings could not be resisted and were eventually inevitable. The husband set up time and location for his appointment. The wife set up time and location for her appointment. When the time for the big meeting arrived, both the husband and wife reacted in total disbelief and shock. The husband saw his wife standing at the prearranged secret location. The wife, of course, saw here husband at her prearranged secret location. They have been, in essence, having an affair with each other all along!

The radio reported that the story ended sadly, with the two of them deciding on divorce after realizing they were cheating on each other. However, if you allow me to be an armchair marriage counselor for a few minutes, can I have a license to interpret the situation more positively and maybe suggest how the marriage can be strengthening rather than breaking apart?

Out of all the possible women to meet online, all over the world, the man ends up getting reacquainted with his wife. Out of all the possible men to meet online, the woman just happens to meet her husband. What are the chances? Instead of focusing on how they cheated on each other, how about looking at it from the point of view that they were cheating with each other? Having unlimited opportunities to meet someone, anyone, they ended up meeting each other again. Can it be like the Cornflakes cereal commercial of appreciating the taste of something familiar for the very first time again?

After all the searching, the testing, the experimenting, the adventures, what they ended looking for was what they already had. If it were me, I couldn’t script a romance better than that.

-Patrick Law

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Filed under News